~Music~Listen To The Beat

Honestly...honestly...

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Hmmmm. Kinda living my life in routine now... Wake up, do my stuff, get ready for school, travel, lessons, do homework in school wif pals, go home, play comp, sleep... Pure routine. And its getting boring... How do i get outta this cycle? Sigh...feel lik my energy's getting sapped up abit more everyday, just wanna lie down and just STAY DOWN!!!!

Been thinking lately, random questions. But this question kept popping up to myself..."Have i been honest with myself?"... turns out, i guess my overall answer's a no. Have i been honest with my feelings? NO... Have i been honest in reading my symptoms? NO... Have i been honest to my own emotions? Sadly, also a NO...I'm getting more confused by the day...

Today, i think i freaked a kid out. I just looked at him. LOOKED!!! I didn't do anything. And then he cried... Am i that scary? Do i really look that fierce? Maybe...i dunno. But i didn't choose to be this way. I did not. But the world doesn't really seem to understand me.

I have said this before. I'm not a perfect person, but i'm still a person. I have feelings, i have emotions. So can u pls be more considerate to how i feel? If i don't tell u something, that's because i have my reasons. Don't probe me. I'll tell you when i think its time for you to know, when i myself cannnot rectify the situation. Then i shall let you know. If not, i don't wish to let anyone worry. It may seem like i'm a selfish person to you. But please try to understand.

The day before, while on my way to school, i saw the sun. It was red. Blood red. Yet it seemed beautiful. Like a masterpiece. It actually calmed me. That was the first sun rise i had seen after many months.

Then yesterday, i saw the most beautiful sunset i have seen yet. The dying light kind of captivated me. And somehow i didn't want that moment to end. I was asked, "Do you like the sunrise or sunset more?" I would say both. I love both. The sunrise is like the birth of a new life, shining not so brightly yet, but filled with potential. The noon sun would be the peak of a person's life. The pinnacle, where their potential and talents shine the brightess.

And then comes the sunset. Whose light fades. Its like a dying man. Knowing that death is inevitable, but continuing to fight, but losing out in the end. That's the cycle of the sun. The cycle of a human life.

I would love the sky more than anything else. Its beautiful. And it could mean so many things. And can also signify life. The sun would signify your spark of life, the clouds would be all the obstructions in life, and once they past, you'll shine brighter than before. And sometimes, rainbows would appear, those would be your acheivements in life, your happiness. And in the endless blue sky, where everyone seems indifferent, you'll be the only different one. The one to step out, the one to shine, the one that brings life to everyone. That's how beautiful the sky is. However, these words can only express a fraction of my fascination and awe.

This post is something that i've wanted to post for a long time, but i couldn't find the words for it. Now i can rest better. I'm not the person that i say i am. I'm not the personality that i seem to express with my actions. No...i'm much deeper than that. Much deeper than anyone can imagine... ... ...i can only hope that one day, someone will understand me a little better, that someone will be able to fly in the same sky that i'm flying in now... ... ...

空は飛べないけど　翼ならあげよう
それは「もうひとりじゃない」と
君の孤独剥がす言葉
どんな悲観論者(ペシミスト)も　恋をして変わる
選んだ道がもし行き止まりならそこで
迷えばいい

~Covered by a Veil, That's who I am~ ...Enrouge...

The Beat Comes On At 9:26 AM :)

Hey....New Post...Finally!!!!!

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Hiya again!!! Finally able to post some stuff online. Homework has really been getting me down. Have to learn A Maths stuff all over again, with a need addition...Engineering Maths. Can die.

Anyway, about day 1 at my new school!!! First day of school, and i dun have any lessons with my AE class. Super sad. I had other modules which involved lessons with students from other courses. I made new frens of course. And the first lesson i had was CATS (Creativity and Applied Thinking Skills) My teacher was kinda nice? Haha. She was pretty friendly, although i dun know whether cause it was the first lesson or wad... anyway, i made new frens there. Then i had to go off for S&W. The first lesson wasn't much. Just about choosing the sport that you wanted to focus on for this module. I chose basketball, along with another fren. I sure pity those who chose some map reading sport for their midule. Haha.

Went off to the CCA fiesta after that. Signed up for a total of 8 different CCAs? (i forgot) My plan is to go to the first session for all of them, and then see if i like it. If i dun like it, then i won't continue going. Haha. Really evil. But its still a good plan. Haha.

The first week..was basically hectic? Hanging out with new frens, coping to learn new stuff, finding your way around campus. Really a different experience from sec school. Still, i dun regret it. And i manage to finish all the homework i was given in the same week? Cool right? I can finally be free on my weekends. HAHAHAHAHA. Anyway, haven really settled in yet. There's still alot i needa learn.

Today's post willbe really short. I'll end here. Cause i dunno wad else to say. Insufficient sleep can make your brain work weird. So i'll sign off here. Cya!!!!!

羽根が無い天使は　ぼくに言った
家へと帰る　地図をなくした

~Confused...who is it who is in my heart now?...~ ...Enrouge Cross...

The Beat Comes On At 7:08 AM :)

Gam's Birthday Party!!! / 17 Again

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Ok. I know i'm kinda late in updating up on Gam's birthday party. Since it passed like so long ago. But i guess i didn't have enough time (or rather maybe i was lazy?) So...i'll try to update it to the best i remember.

I was supposed to meet Gam and Claire at Khatib MRT, they were coming from Yishun. But then some misunderstanding, then i ended up going to Yio Chu Kang first while they alighted at Khatib. Super funny and weird. But we still managed to meet up in the end. Then we travelled to Vivo. Shopped for awhile where i bought my new mouse there. I thought the design was quite cool.

nice right? Haha. Anyway, we met up wif Amanda later, then we went to eat at earle's swensens. Its supposed to be another version of the normal swensens. Except that i can't really tell the diff. Maybe cause there's a salad bar which the normal swensens does not possess? I dunno. When we looked at the menu, we were like "waaa....the portions like very small leh." Tat was wad i thought at first. But since it was the restaurant with the shortest queue, (everywhere else was packed) we ate there anyway. But when the food came, we made a mistake lor. The servings are quite ok actually. Plus, Claire and Amanda practically filled themselves with just the SALAD before the food even came. Haha. The food tasted great. And we SOMEHOW managed to finish everything. By the time we finished the food, paid the bill and left, it was almost time for the movie. But i still had to check out a Zinc shop. Was trying to shop for a backpack then. But then due to the lack of time, we only had time for a quick look before we took some group pics and then left for the movie. Amanda went home though. Cause she said she didn't want to watch 'Knowing'.

The movie was... ... ...disturbing at some scenes? Especially the starting and all the accidents. Super disturbing. And it freaks you out to know that these accidents can actually occur in real life at any moment. *Shudder* But the ending was a happy one i guess? The world is destroyed but then at least there are survivors to start everything again. I would reccomend people to catch this show. Its really good. If you won't have nightmares at night and you dun freak out tat easily lik Claire. I totally freaked her out when we were heading out of the theatre i think. I suddenly turned back and frightened her. She did wad every girl who was freaked out did...she screamed. And boy, it was loud and sharp. My ears hurt. And the people walking in front of us turned back lor. Haha. I was laughing so hard. Even funnier was when Claire and Gam told me about this guy sitting beside her. A GROWN man. And he's as brave as Claire. Or maybe Claire has more courage than him. What's everyone turning into these days. Haiz... *shakes head* Anyway, i would rate 'Knowing' 8 out of 10. (8/10). Its good, but sometimes it doesn't make sense too.

After the movie, we headed home. Managed to catch the LAST train home. Super lucky. I've never sat on the last train. So it was pretty cool. Especially when u hear that the station was closing, i was wondering like, "Wow. So thay do have opening and closing hours..." Reached home, bathed and then hit the sack. Totally exhausted.

Some pics first... (btw, this post is gonna be long)

Studying Clique...Love them to the MAX!!!

Ok...now for today's post. Went to Bugis in the morning with my family. Ate brunch at some Roti Prata stall at Thompson before heading to Bugis. Then met up with Amanda at Bugis to help me choose my backpack. I FINALLY GOT MY BACKPACK!!! I'd say it looks pretty much. It might not look much, but to me it looks gorgeous. Haha.

I'm happy...

Anyway, continuing... went shopping wif Amanda for awhile. Then cause Bugis like nothing to walk, we went to Orchard. Went to buy tickets for '17 Again'. Then, since we still had about an hour plus to spare, we went to Wisma for more shopping. Amanda bought some stuff there. But the funny thing was, for all the clothes that she wanted to buy, she couldn't find her size for all of it. Definitely not her day. Haha. Then we went back to Cineleisure to watch the movie. It totally rocked! '17 Again' is definitely a nice show. To me la. But its not up to my "must watch" rating yet.

Zack Efron was great. Good acting. Nice plot, alot of funny scenes. Good show. Some teachings about morales too. Kinda deep. Haha. But it was enjoyable. I dun really have anything to say about it. But to me, i'll rate it a 7 out of 10 (7/10). And i have to thank Amanda for watching it again with me!!! Thx girl!!!

So tat's about wad happened today. Nothing much. So i'll end off here today. Till next time then. Cya!!!!

好きになることにおびえていた
好きになることで傷つけた
思い出にできず　あおぐ空が
まぶしすぎて　落ちる涙

...I live by the cross of sins...can no one lift this curse from me?... ~...Enrouge Cross...~

The Beat Comes On At 5:33 AM :)

Update / Code Geass: Lelouch of the Rebellion

Friday, April 10, 2009

Date: 11th of April
Time: 2:13am

...Log Start...

Its late at night. And somehow i just can't get to sleep. So i thought about updating my blog.

I just finished the book 7 Deadly Wonders by Matthew Reilly. Its really really good. Pure thriller and suspense. It just made me want to continue reading on and on. I can hardly put the book down. Other books by Matthew Reilly include Contest, Ice Station, Area 7, Temple, Scarecrow and The Six Sacred Stones. All the books are just as good as the other. So i would recommend any bookworm to read it.

Speaking of books, i had a major haul today. Think i bought a total of 5 books? Went to Tampines Mall with my parents and sis. Bought 2 books there from SAN Bookshop. Its a nice bookshop. U can even sell books that u dun feel lik reading anymore to them. Profitable. I also went to Zinc to Checkout some backpacks. Found 2 that i really lik. PLUS!!! They also included laptop bags in them. A bargain right??!!! I'll be wanting to go back there again to buy those bags. Anyone interested to accompany me? And i am also eyeing a mouse which i saw at Popular. I can only hope that Northpoint's Popular has the mouse design that i want. Or maybe something better.

Went off to Changi Airport Terminal 3 next. Went there to eat. And that was where i bought my next 3 books. ( they were having an offer. 3 for he price of 2!!!) i managed to find 3 books that i wanted which was on offer. So i might as well have bought them. Then it was the trip back home. That pretty much sums up the day since i spent the rest of it at home playing games.

And coming to the topic on computer games. I just started on the new Asiasoft game Rappelz. Its something like Cabal, or maybe alot like Cabal. Except that things are a little more to the Medieval side of things.But i still enjoy it anyway. I'm currently at lvl 31 only. Aiming to reach the second job before my school starts. If anyone's playing this game as well, inform me yeah? It'll be good to have more frens around.

And now for the anime part. Actually i finished Code Geass quite sometime ago. It was after Clannad of course. (Which i still think is the best school life + romance + comedy + tradegy anime i've ever watched) Code Geass is....hmmmm....cool? Imagine yourself having special powers that can manipulate the person's mind. Cool right? The main character is Lelouch Lamperouge/ vi Brittania. His past...complicated. Something you'd have to find out yourself when u watch the anime. They're also other sub-main characters like C.C, Suzaku Krurugi, Nunally Lamperouge and Kallen Stadtfeld/ Kozuki. The anime is clever in its own way, it has two seasons which are kinda interelated, yet not so. And you'll get to see brilliant tactics and strategies pulled off buy our main character and other characters in the anime. Its good. But somehow it jus doesn't meet some of my requirements. If there's a need to rate it, i would give it 7.5 out of 10 stars (7.5/10). True, the abilities are cool, the machines are wicked sick and some parts of the show are unexpected. But it still lacks a certain element in its plot. And it can get pretty confusing at times. But still, watch Code Geass. Maybe you'd have a different opinion.

Currently watching: Full Metal Alchemist, Bleach

Animes finished but yet to comment: Toradora, Skip Beat, Fate/Stay Night...

So i'll be signing off here for today morning. Gonna try catch some shut eye now. Cya...

罪の最後は涙じゃないよ
ずっと苦しく背負ってくんだ
出口見えない感情迷路に
誰を待ってるの？
白いノートに綴ったように
もっと素直に吐き出したいよ
何から　逃れたいんだ
…現実ってやつ？

"I'm not alone...am I?"...Enrouge Cross...

*~unconfirmed feelings~*
...Log End...

The Beat Comes On At 11:08 AM :)